To Love Again: What Chrome Felt
by silver silhouette 08
Summary: Sequel to Hibari's Musings


**Disclaimer:** I definitely do not own KHR or the characters. Amano-sempai does, and I admire her for creating wonderful characters so don't sue me of copyright infringement, or my illusionary boyfriend Hibari Kyoya will BITE YOU TO DEATH 3 neh?

**A/N note**: This seven-part series of Oneshot fics are all HibariChrome pairings. It is all combined under one compilation entitled To Love Again. So here is the third oneshot, What Chrome Felt. Need a summary? Okay.

The setting is ten years after the battle with Shimon Famiglia. Chrome is still Rokudo Mukuro's puppet, and she stayed inlove with him through the past ten years. Then, Mukuro disappeared and left her, telling her that he no longer needs Chrome but as thanksgiving, he will keep on providing the illusionary organs that Chrome needs to survive. So this is where the story begins. It is Kyoya-kun's POV, and is based on what he know and what he observed and felt.

This one shot is a Chrome special, yet it is still Hibari-san's POV. So don't misunderstand. I just felt comfortable telll :) Hope it isn't a bit too dark. I got a wee bit carried away. :)

x.x.x

"_Where am I?_"

You feel lost, confused and alone, waking up in this cold and dark place. Null, empty. Lifeless.

"_Mukuro-sama?_"

You called out in vain, hoping, praying that he would respond. But there was only silence. Painful and crippling silence. You knew you were alone in that darkness.

So you stood up and ran in all directions, not knowing which way was forward, or backward. You just ran, hoping you'd find Mukuro and that happy paradise you shared with him for ten years.

"_Mukuro-sama! Mukuro-sama!_"

You continued looking for him, but inside you knew he wasn't going to answer.

Finally, when you were tired, and hoarse from shouting, you stopped.

"_Mukuro...sama._"

You whispered. Tears falling down your purple eyes.

Then, within the darkness that surrounds you, you heard a familliar voice.

"_I don't understand her!_" you heard your mom say.

"_Okaa-san.._"

"_She's not my daughter! We're not related by blood!_" It was your step father.

"_You're pathetic!"_  
>"<em>Stupid girl."<br>"Nobody cares about you!"_

_"Stop! Stop it!" _You shouted, stung by the rejection in the voices.

"_Nagi. My dear Nagi." _Mukuro's voice said.

"_Mukuro...sama."_

Yes. You lived a horrible life Chrome. A life full of rejection. Everyday you basked in pain and loneliness, having to live another day in a world where no one cared and liked you. You longed for a mother who'll love you, a father who'll protect you. You ache for friends who'll accept and understand you. But there was no one. Until Mukuro came.

He needed you. And that was the first time you felt needed, wanted, by anyone. So you embraced Mukuro with open arms and you were loyal and devoted. For the first time, you felt sort of loved. And you loved him, despite knowing his real intentions.

Then there were those people you became friends with, the Vongola family. Even the weird sort of friendship you had with Ken and Chikusa made you so happy.

To you, Mukuro was the redeemer. He saved you from the misery of being invisible.

Slowly, you learned to warm up to others. You shined with pure innocence and joy, everyone was bound to like just being in your presence. Even me.

However, Mukuro left. He no longer had any use for you. But you kept your illusionary organs.

You were so brokenhearted, you felt much worse than before he came.

You felt cold. A numbing kind of cold that eased your pain.

And you woke up, to see mee watching you.

"How are you?" I asked non-challant.

You stared at me with cold eyes and replied lifelessly, "I'm okay."

Right then I knew you weren't but I didn't know how to approach you, so I just replied with a "Hn"

That was the biggest mistake of my life. If I have shown a little bit of care, you would have opened up, but I didn't, and you kept to yourself.

It was the beggining of your zombie state. You wake up, try to eat, and after a few bites, you stop, sit in a corner of the sofa for the rest of the day, take a shower, and go back to sleep. You respond when a question is directed at you, but other wise, you remain silent. At night when you try to sleep, I could hear your sobs. But you never mentioned his name. I would see you writing phrases like "I won't let anyone use me anymore" or "I am a totally new person" trying to convince yourself. You tried, to let your life continue, but it was a lame attempt at living.

Three months within that state, you woke up with a different kind of energy around you. I was hopeful, waiting for you to breakdown. I was thinking maybe you'll start healing. The light in your eyes was definitely dull, but it was there.

So you startled me by asking to bring Sawada Tsunayoshi here. You said you needed to talk to him. I was desperate for anything to make you better, so I called Sawada and within the next hour, he was already there.

"I want real organs" you say. We were expecting this, so when Sawada Tsunayoshi answered you Yes, three weeks after that and you had gone operation.

Your recovery was spectacular. within weeks, you were ready to go, and you trained so hard that within the next two months, you ranked second strongest guardian of the Vongola.

For the past six months you have stayed in my house, and I watched you closely. Then finally, the battle with the ninety-four came. They planned to attack the Vongola boss, and you annihilated them singlehandedly.

I would have lent you a hand, have I not seen the effect of killing those men in you. You were definitely glad to be able to vent your pain, the hatred bottled up inside you. You were tired but your wrath kept you going. I saw your face lighten up a bit after the ninety-fourth was killed.

When all was dead, I jumped down from where I was watching. You knew I was there.

"Did you enjoy the show?" you said.

"Hn."

You tried to walk away but your battle drained you and you fainted. I caught you and carried you home.

You felt, for a moment while I carried you, warm and cared for. You wanted to dissolve so much in the warmth that I gave, but you weren't sure whether I would consent to it. So I held you tighter.

Once inside your room, I set you on the bed, and I was on my way out when you stopped me. Holding my hand you said "Please stay, Hibari."

I heard your tears before I saw it. So I turned around and stayed. I hugged you. The first person I ever hugged in a long time since my mom died when I was five. You cried your heart out. No words spoken, you just let it all out, while I let you ruin my shirt.

And when you got tired and fell asleep, I kissed you on the forehead. You look so peaceful.

In your dream, you felt someone kissed you and the kissed seemed real.

When I was about to step out, I heard you.

"Kyoya-kun..." you whispered "Thank you."

You were the first person to call me Kyoya-kun.

x.x.x

So. That's it.  
>Whew. As usual, my net isn't working well. Good thing I copied the text before trying to post it, or else this entire work would have gone to waste. Net still not fixed :(<p> 


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